I feel alone already.

Michael leaves on Friday and I feel as though he's already gone. But then again, I can tell that I have "checked out", in the emotional sense too. I guess this is our way of attempting to be strong for one another, at least it's my way. But it is failing, miserably...

But what is the best way to prepare for your husband, or wife, to deploy? Do you push him or her out? Do you spend every waking moment with them? My first reaction is to be around Michael as much as possible and do things with the kids together as a family...It's fascinating to realize that there are so many things that either need to be done around the house or that I want to have done around the house before he leaves. I have dubbed it the 'honey-do list'.

I just hate that, for the year he is home is passes so quickly, and the four months that he's gone is seems to just creep by. But I have to keep telling myself that four month is not that bad considering there are some military spouses that are dealing with 12-18 month deployments. But it doesn't mean that those four months stink any less.

Here's hoping that the four months pass quickly and that I can stay busy and preoccupied.